A tired RANT

Okay I have to get this off of my chest. Im not normal. In fact im very far from it. I have an extremely inquiring, technical, curious, perceptive, deep, and pondering mind. I do not look at any object as just a physical entity. I look at an object and all at once wonder what it is made of, how it got here, whats its purpose, how it effects me, etc, etc, etc. Which means my mind is always racing....neurons always firing. I have always known that I was created this way. Even at a young age I questioned everything. I was always reading. Always soaking up knowledge. I yearn to understand this world we live in. I yearn to understand the grand purpose of it all. Yeah i know...religion supposedly explains it all. BUT, written doctrine only further confuses me. Too many contradictions. Too many gray areas. Im done with eating the bits and pieces of someone elses ideology. I want to KNOW the TRUTH for MYSELF. Perhaps everyone has a different truth. Perhaps there is no truth. You see how quickly my mind races? My gift of the quest for knowledge often feels like a curse. I often feel like im running through a maze with no way out. I answer one question only to be given 5 more.  I am highly convinced that one day it will all make sense. One day every puzzle piece that is floating in my head will form a cohesive picture of TRUTH.  Or maybe I'll come and go on this earth like the billions before me and just be apart of an inconclusive history.